I, for those who are unaware, am enrolled in a distance university. I’ve recently completed two courses, so naturally said distance university mailed the final exams, via DHL, to Damascus Syria. Not to be confused with Damascus, VA. Five weeks, three emails and two voice messages – and a partridge in a pear tree – later, I find out that they’ve been here. The entire time. For over 5 weeks. Held because of a ‘bad address.’
To add insult to injury – that or just for the hell of it – they destroy one package and hold the other. That’s right. Destroy. Who on earth does that to a package?! And with no lurking bomb suspicion as incentive. Only a measly bad address. My mind’s picturing white suits and protective goggles, complete with air-tight containers, spontaneous combustions, and ominous puffs of smoke. That or the paper shredder.
I am raging. I want to rip someonething apart. I had a one, one month break before my next courses, which are piled up in one corner of my room, a seemingly innocent pile of processed tree for God’s sake, began. A threatening reminder of Hell to Come (i.e. more studying). And now it’s gone. And not because they (the exams) failed to make it over. Were they an ocean away I’d give in to the fact that I had no access to them. But no. All this time they’ve been here, less than a 15 minute drive away. And I’ve been going mad, not 10 minutes away. Err… 15.
I want to kill. Preferably the DHL employee responsible for the destruction and detainment of my exams.
Exaggeration? Consider this the straw that broke this camel’s back.
Off note, but speaking of camels, I ran into one the other day. A Syrian exclusive, because honestly, “I ran into a camel” is something people just can’t say in all honesty. Honestly.
Back to the point. My exam is this Saturday. The one that survived. The other is to be mailed. My university has kindly waivered the fee. Which is all around beneficial to all. I wouldn’t want to commit couriericide, after all.
Tomorrow’s rant: “Self-righteous preaching of the sort only a Syrian male can pull off.” I’d heard of these people but up until a few days ago I hadn’t had the misfortune of actually meeting one. Revolting experience. Brace yourselves.