Ramadan Resolutions

Nine or ten more days left inshAllah, and then it’s hellooooo Ramadan!!

This Ramadan will be the Ramadan to end all Ramadans! And I know I say this every year but this year will be different, God willing. This time I have a game plan.

Step 1: Make Ramadan resolutions. Buy a journal to keep track of successes (new things get me motivated, lol.)

Step 2: Order the Heartwheel Journal. Use it. =)

Step 3: Pufiry my intentions; before an act, during an act, and after an act.

K. So step 1:

Ramadan Resolutions!

1. Read the entire Quran (mandatory)
2. Pray Fajir and Ishaa congregation at the mosque
3. Start and break my fast according to the Sunnah.

Those are my three major goals.  I also have minor goals:

1. Continue with memorization of the Hadeeth Nawawi (on number 3 =D)
2. Strengthen the weekly halaqa I give.
3. Strengthen my ties with my family and community
4. Say the morning and evening dua’as
5. Purify my intentions before, during, and after an act!
6. SMILE =D
7. Thank Allah (swt) for everything.
8. Occupy spare time – walking to work, bus ride to uni – with thikr.

أَلاَ بِذِكْرِ اللَّهِ تَطْمَئِنُّ الْقُلُوبُ

Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest. (13:28)

I’m so excited for Ramadan =)

MSA Hike ‘09

"No more up!" some guy who was hiking.... as in peak of the mountain. I'm right on the left of the girl in pink. Amazing view, eh?

I went hiking with the MSA on Saturday. It was straight up exhilarating!!!

The way up was unbelievably easy.. when compared to the way down. Because, well I had to go. As in go go. And there were about 35 guys with us, some behind us and some in front, as well as random people jogging, cycling, or hiking. And a bunch of girls who I wouldn’t have put it past to snap off a pic with me heeding the call of nature. So what’s a person to do?

I ran down the mountain. All that jogging came in handy because it was around 2 hours straight speed walking and full out running (depending on the terrain).

Then relief alhamdulillah, and forty minutes spent soaking my poor, aching feet in the lake till the others caught up.

Isn’t it beautiful though?

And then we spent the bus ride back either passed out from exhaustion or, in my case, high off adrenaline. So we played Chinese telephone, and those hand games? Remember them? Stella ella ola, concentration, rocking robins, miss molly, Charlie Brown? Oh, and telling dirty jokes, hahahhaha.

Loooooveed it! I can’t wait to go again <33

Oh and if you’re wondering were this is, it’s near Kananaskis in Alberta. We hiked the jewel pass, which is near Barrier Lake.

=D

I’m Gonna Break the Cycle

Assiya Rafiq, right, in front of her mother, Iqbal Mai.

And I’m not talking about Madonna here.

As a Syrian and a Muslim it pains me to say this. But, there is an Arabic proverb that says “you see the sliver in other peoples’ eyes, yet fail to see the pole in your own.” So, just because I’d rather not be own of ‘those people’ I’m going to say it like it is.

By this day and age, everyone has heard of those horrific honour killings. Your daughter, sister, mother disgraces you and your family? Off with their head! Forget that there’s a God involved here, or a shariaa law that – as a Muslim – you’re bound to obey, or even basic concepts like humanity and familial ties.

When I first moved to Syria, a video was circulating depicting the public beating and killing of a woman. Oh Allah. My cousins held me down and forced me to watch. I’m not going to go into details but those images will be with me to my dying day. Thank God there is a God who will see that justice is meted out in the end, because we live in one cruel world!

It’s so sickening. When you hear of these people who contrary to everything they should know as humans and as muslims, acting in cruel, heartless ways. Don’t they fear God?? What goes around will come around… Ya Allah!

What bought this to mind was the story of Assiya Rafiq. Assiya Rafiq was kidnapped at the age of 16 and repeatedly raped and beaten by a group of thugs. A year later, once they’d had their fill, they delivered her to a police station. Unfortunately, salvation and peace were a long time coming, and Assiya was subjected to rape by the four police officers.

This all took place in Pakistan. Now, in Pakistan, the only option available to a woman who has undergone the shame of rape is to commit suicide. That was she cleanses herself and her family name. Never mind that she is innocent, or that suicide is FORBIDDEN in Islam.

But this particular woman isn’t having any of that. She’s fighting the system, demanding to have her rights recognized and the men who raped her prosecuted.

I’m in awe of her bravery. When I was in Syria, I faced that cultural wall quite a few times, when culture dictated I do something completely contrary to my beliefs. And even though it wasn’t something as oppressing and merciless as rape, I still felt as though I were being backed into the proverbial corner. It was not a pleasant experience. Some days I stuck by my beliefs. Others a faltered. May God give her the strength to see this through and break that damn cycle!

(source)

Lookin’ for some Blackberry luuurve 03

Piss off [noun] – An event or situation for which there is no solution or is forced upon you by circumstance. Usually involving something that could have been avoided if the other person would just change!

Y’all know my bold right? Well I bought it exactly 16 days ago from the source for a sum of 249.00. Today, I was informed that the price had gone down 100 bucks. I called The Source to see if I could get a price match and… I’m one day late. ONE DAY!  They have a 15 day and prior policy, and I’m on day 16. The piss off? My dad knew about it two days ago, which would have effectively put me at 14 days – thus safely within the 15 day or prior policy.

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuut. It’s all good, alhamdulillah. Hasan Al Basri used to say:

I reached my level of piety through four things:

1. I know my Rizq is written and would not be taken away from if Allah has decreed it, so I remain content.

2. I know nobody will do my actions for me so I do them myself and don’t rely on anyone else to do them.

3. I  know my Lord is watching me so I don’t want Him seeing me commit any sin.

4. I know one day I will be standing before Allah (swt) so I try to keep myself prepared for that.

So it’s all good. I was never meant to get that 100 dollars back….

By the way, I LOVE number two!!! SubhanAllah, it’s what I try to live my life by:

“Be the change you want to see in the world.”- Mahatma Gandhi

On Chinese Stereotypes

Picture this: an Arab working for a Chinese roofing company. What I mean by Chinese roofing company though isn’t that the roofs are redone in an Oriental manner but rather the owners of the company are Chinese. Who speak about ten words of English between the three of them.

Now as a first generation adult, my brother’s cool with that. He likes these guys and they like him – they’re teaching him Chinese and he’s teaching them English. They even gave him Chinese tea – yuummm!! – and buy him Chinese food for lunch every day.

Enter an uncle who hears William’s been working for a Chinese guy. Reaction?

“I never liked the Chinese! Did you watch all those movies? They’re all two-faced! They act good but what goes on in their lives is freaky!”

*laughing because I thought he was kidding* “Why do you say that?”

*he’s dead serious* “Well, you saw their movies. Drugs, and bad sex, and gangs. Not good people.”

“You do realize those movies were directed by none other than hollywood – America? And don’t necessarily represent real Chinese people?”

“Enough already! I know them. They’re all very two faced!”

*I’m getting mad now* “But uncle, you have a daughter and a wife! You have a beard! How do you like it when other people stick us under a certain stigma or stereotype?? I want people to respect me as an individual, not as some secretive Taliban recruit with a bomb under my hijab!”

“Nonsense! We’re not like that! The media is garbage! But they are. Their movies say so. Khalas. Enough. Uncle knows best.”

Oh my God in Heaven you did not just say that! This guy is an ARAB! His daughter and wife wear the SCARF! They’ve been suffering under all those stereotypes and misconceptions for so long, and I know them personally. I know myself and the struggles I’ve faced because people are narrow-minded, biased, media-garbage guzzlers who routinely fail to exercise the grey matter between their ears!! And now this Arab who is a victim of stereotypes is actually holding prejudices against Chinese people…. because of the media!!!???

*head-desk*

Cruel irony? Or just deserts?

Purification

**Below is yet another of my gratitude posts. You have been duly warned**

Asalaamualykum! (May peace be on you, you, annndd you!!)

Honestly, it’s straight amazing. I can’t even say that phrase anymore without thinking of the implications behind it. It literally translates “may peace be with you.” So much more heartfelt and meaningful than hi, eh?

Right, so on to the gratitude.

1. alhamdulillah thuma alhamdulillah for everything Allah has blessed me with. After three long years of struggle, and feeling like everything is constantly up in the air all I can say is thank you Good Lord for everything! All the pieces are falling into place, and all my hopes are coming true. I mean my job, my uni, my volunteering, and more are all coming true!
2. Thank you God for my community. I know this is unbearably corny, but be patient with me. I feel… supported. I’ve always been the odd one out, both in Canada before I left and then again in Syria. I never felt like I was with people who wanted what I wanted, who had the same vision or goal. And now, alhamdulillah, I found it =)
3. Alhamdulillah for my strength. I’ve taken three major steps in my life and I feel like each is a leap and a bound on the path I’m yearning to walk. One of these was the whole “To Pluck or not to Pluck” issue, and alhamdulilah we’re back at Not Pluck; this time for good inshAllah. Because this time, when I had my sit down with myself it was crystal clear that I was doing this for the right reasons, which is yet another thing to thank God for.
4. The course I’ve recently attended. A Heart Serene offered by Al Maghrib. So it’s a four-day course complete with an exam, and alhamdulillah it tied in everything above and then some. I have never, EVER laughed so freely, cried with such elation, or hugged so many people in my life. It was brilliant. No wait. That’s inadequate. It was astounding. Reviving. Enlightening. I can’t wait till the next course =D
5. My parents. I love you both more than you can ever imagine. Thank you for loving me unconditionally, spoiling me rotten (solo chicka with four brothers, watchu expect?), being whatever I need, when I need it, and caring enough to let me know when I’m wrong.
6. My blackberry! I don’t know where I’d be without you.

There’s a lot more – everything basically – but today has been one of the longest days of my life. I want sleep and I want it now!

ps: I have a goal: be a better blogger! What on earth happened to a post a day?! Yeesh!

Goodnight world!

Lookin’ for Some Blackberry luuurrrvee 02

I BOUGHT IT!

The bold. The boooooooooooold. The BOOOOLLLLDDDD.

I love it. It’s gorgeous. Amazing. Mine. My precious.

Alhamdulillah.

*sigh*

Heaven. Right here on earth. Who’da thunk it?

Lookin’ for some Blackberry luuurve

I’m the type that falls into obsession at first sight. It’s uncontrollable, irrational, and irritating, but one glance and it’s final: I.Have.To.Have.It.Now.Dear.God.Please.NOW

And that is, unfortunately, what happened the second I clapped eyes on the Blackberry Bold. Unforunate because it’s going to leave yours truly 300 dollars lighter at a time when I’m building my life up from ground zero. But what can I do? I even went in to get – what my Daddy calls – its little sister: the Curve.

Uh, no. Nothin’ doin’.

MusthaveBolddearGodpleaseNOW!!!

Buuuut that’s not going to happen. Two weeks. Less if I can talk my dad into (yet another) loan. Ugh.

During my jog today 02

I haven’t gone for about two weeks what with late nights studying, volunteering, and not being able to get up in the mornings, so today I said enough was enough. We didn’t wake up in the morning, so we went at around Maghrib time, which is about 9:20. I got my sweats on, my drink on (water bottle lol), filled up gas, picked up my jogging buddy and we were off down 69th like usual.

In the morning it’s quaint. Very little traffic, and all the other pedestrians are joggers who make a point to look you in the eye and smile a ‘hello.’ It’s a greeting, encouragement, and support all rolled into a flash of teeth. The world is waking and you’re witnessing it.

At night it’s a whole other world. That time of day is my favorite. A lot of people say sunrises are beautiful, alluding to fresh beginnings. But I’ve always been a sunset girl. Dusk is when I come to life, when the air fills with anticipation, the skies darken, the world comes to life in a dizzying array of colours. It’s fleeting though, close you’re eyes and open them and in that swift second the world has changed.

So there we were, collapsed on the curb  near my car in a parking lot, drinking water like it was going out of style, and discussing stand up comedians, of all things. When this car drives by twice, the first time zooming by, then slower for a closer look, with this white kid gaping at us. It parks a distance away, does  a U turn and comes in for one more go, this time outside the parking lot, on 69th. He leans out, screams a very eloquent “FUCK YOU,” and revs off.

By this time it’s full dark, and my friend was getting kind of antsy. It’s Sunday night and Calgary’s dead, or at least this area is. But why the hell should I?? Jugding by the look I got of the kid, he’s younger than I am! I was, quite literally,  here first and I’m not moving till I’m damn well good and ready to move!

After the spurt of anger, it was emptiness. These encounters, while rare, always leave me drained of hope. And soooo confused! Ugh.  I will never, ever understand racism or prejudice.

Alhamdulillah for the life I lead, which has taught me respect and tolerance above all else.

I break you don’t, I was always set to self-destruct though

Where you stand tall, I cower
Where you are firm, I falter.
Where you are sure, I stumble.
Where you are whole, I crumble.

When I cower, you shield me.
When I falter, you steady me.
When I stumble, you catch me.
When I crumble, you heal me.

I was listening to If There’s a Rocket Tie me To it, right after listening to Al-Imran by Saad Al-Ghamdi, and this kinda wrote itself. I know they’re fundamentally irreconcilable, but they both have such a tremendous impact on my life. I <3 music and the Quran is my life.

Anyway, this is totally irrelevant in my life, as I’m the one that’s always running around picking up the pieces – both my own and others – but there you have it. Alhamdulillah.

But, sometimes…. sometimes I wish I knew where this was all going!